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Pretenders, Masculinity, and Depression
How to find out if a person pretends to suffer from depression: They talk with everyone about their depression.

Really depressed people can not even eat like a normal person because they simply don’t care, I didn’t give the slightest fuck about talking about depression when I had it.

The pain was so severe that I just wanted it to end and looked for the correct solutions (which I couldn’t find at the beginning).

The number of pretenders on the web that want to score pity and attention from other people is too damn high! Like it’s some kind of achievement to say that you have depression. 

Anyway, the following 22 depression quotes by people that had depression have something in common: They lack masculinity.

That is no surprise for me because I know that male depression is a lack of masculinity

Below the quotes, I have written how I would have helped these men to overcome their depression or just state my opinion about that quote.

At the end you will also find a quote about masculinity, that quote is the best because it tells you how to overcome depression. 

But don’t overread the other quotes because you will identify with a lot of them and you will also miss a lot of solutions that I will state. 

The truths about these quotes serve as a small rite of passage into manhood if you take action (I included actionable tips in my answers).
22 Accurate Depression Quotes + Advice
Quote 1:It’s brilliant, being depressed; you can behave as badly as you like.” -Nick Hornby, High Fidelity

Answer: That is true but only someone that seems to enjoy his depression would come up with that thought – I think by that time he was not depressed anymore.

Anyway, if you are depressed and realize that you can do a lot of bullshit and later say “I am depressed, sorry” without consequences and go out to do stuff then you are just making it worse even when you feel better (for a short time).

A lack of responsibility is one of the main causes of male depression. Not doing anything because you are depressed will make it worse and you know that – do you want it to get worse?

Yes? No? You don’t care? Ok if you don’t care about it then you wouldn’t read this: If you care about getting rid of your depression you should start taking responsibility for your life again.

Pets, jobs, your health – they all demand your time and you must take care of them. They will give you a 24/7 purpose – a reason to wake up.

Walking a big doggo or pupper around, succeeding at your job/business or progressing in the gym (affiliate link) has the power to force a smile on your face.



Quote 2: “I didn’t want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that’s really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you’re so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare.” -Ned Vizzini, It’s Kind of a Funny Story

Answer: I know that feeling, when dying in your sleep is better than waking up to the cold harsh reality that your girlfriend just left you, that you have no money, and that you live in a house with crazy people.

It requires a lot of work to feel better when you are awake than when you are asleep. In the case of above starting a business, leaving the house and learning to be alone are the perfect solutions. Therapy or medication for depression won’t change anything.


Quote 3: “If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather.” – Anonymous

Answer: Wrong. Why do people get depressed when someone dies, they breakup or some other reason? 

Working for someone else, needing other people to be happy, eating the wrong foods and having a ruined sleep cycle are enough reasons to get depressed.

Most people don’t know that these problems are legit reasons for depression and when they get depressed they think that it’s because of some hormonal imbalance in their brain which is not even proven and that depression is just “like the weather”. 

But there is one hormone that plays a huge role for men and that is called testosterone. If you are not taking care of your basic needs (see Maslow’s hierarchy below) then your t-levels will decrease. And the effects of low testosterone are dangerous for men.

Depression quotes maslows hierarchy


Quote 4: “Try to understand the blackness, lethargy, hopelessness, and loneliness they’re going through. Be there for them when they come through the other side. It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it is one of the kindest, noblest, and best things you will ever do.” – Stephen Fry

Answer: I only recommend this if that person is a really good friend that you value a lot because it is hard to not feel down around permanently depressed people. I would rather tell him to hit the gym and to get into MMA -TODAY because otherwise he will waste his time with therapists and fry his brain with SSRIs.

There is a third option when you can help depressed people and that is when you have experience with depression and you have chosen it as your job to help other depressed people to overcome it. 

So either you tell them to sign up at an MMA gym that also got weights or you send them to me. If he doesn’t want to do it then I recommend avoiding that person because he does not want to change his situation.

He will contact you again once he realizes his potential. You usually get a WhatsApp message or sometimes even a thank you letter.


Quote 5: “Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression.” – Dodie Smith, I Capture the Castle

Answer: Well, not exactly but they surely help with depression. It does not really matter what noble deed it is because once you do it you will simply don’t think about depression anymore (a clear indication that depression is just a certain thought pattern).

Secondly, you will have done something good! Hot baths or whatever is good for your soul will help, it does not have to be hot baths. The best thing that you can do to feel good is to buy and receive a thai massage, to fight, and to lift heavy weights.



Quote 6: “When you’re surrounded by all these people, it can be lonelier than when you’re by yourself. You can be in a huge crowd, but if you don’t feel like you can trust anyone or talk to anybody, you feel like you’re really alone.” -Fiona Apple

Answer: I had this once when I was visiting a concert by myself, I really just went there to get to know new people but it didn’t work. I was lonely because I needed others to feel happy. I was running through thousands of people feeling like an illusion.

If Fear Factory would play on stage and they would sell a lot of beer I would surely go there – because I like it (not because I need other people).

The solution here is to learn to be alone – to not need other people for whatever reason. The only way to learn to be alone is to have a purpose that you think about 24/7 and to simply live alone and manage everything by yourself.

It will give you incredible strength and freedom, family and friends will think that you are a different person because you can walk away/quit at any time if you wanted to.



Quote 7: “Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden: it is easier to say “My tooth is aching” than to say “My heart is broken.” –C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

Answer: Completely agree with that quote. What else needs to be said here? Fix it! Here is the complete guide to cure your male depression by yourself.



Quote 8: “Listen to the people who love you. Believe that they are worth living for even when you don’t believe it. Seek out the memories depression takes away and project them into the future. Be brave; be strong; take your pills. Exercise because it’s good for you even if every step weighs a thousand pounds. Eat when food itself disgusts you. Reason with yourself when you have lost your reason.” -Andrew Solomon, The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression

Answer: Agree with everything except taking your pills. Not thinking about depression, being brave and strong, exercising, eating even when you feel like shit and being there for others are all good ways to deal with your depression. 



Quote 9: “It’s so hard to talk when you want to kill yourself. That’s above and beyond everything else, and it’s not a mental complaint-it’s a physical thing like it’s physically hard to open your mouth and make the words come out. They don’t come out smooth and in conjunction with your brain the way normal people’s words do; they come out in chunks as if from a crushed-ice dispenser; you stumble on them as they gather behind your lower lip. So you just keep quiet.” –Ned Vizzini, It’s Kind of a Funny Story

Answer: Yes, this is how it feels to have depression. I couldn’t even talk out 3 sentences because either I would just cry (when depression is in its early stages) or because I would simply not care about anything (depression in its later stage). 



Quote 10:I’ll never forget how the depression and loneliness felt good and bad at the same time. Still, does.” -Henry Rollins, The Portable Henry Rollins

Answer: Edgy. Loneliness never felt good. Or does someone else know how to feel good being lonely and depressed? Seems like Henry wanted some attention.



Quote 11: “If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.” –Amit Ray, Om Chanting, and Meditation

Answer: Perfect and easy to achieve – do things that demand your attention and you will forget your depression (like following your goals and purpose), no meditation required. Purpose alone is so powerful, you actually don’t need anything else to overcome depression. 

Wonder why Stallone went from hobo to multi-millionaire? He was tired of the streets and made it his purpose to get that money.



Quote 12: “I am in that temper that if I were under water I would scarcely kick to come to the top.” –John Keats

Answer: This describes hopelessness and not caring about dying – at that point, a lot of your fears become childish (use that!). And besides that, there is no need to be hopeless – you found this website!



Quote 13: “Sometimes I just think depression’s one way of coping with the world. Like, some people get drunk, some people do drugs, some people get depressed. Because there’s so much stuff out there that you have to do something to deal with it.” –Ned Vizzini, It’s Kind of a Funny Story 

Answer: No. Other people are doing something to escape from reality while depressed people face the thoughts that make them depressed in the first place. But I know for sure that the people practicing constant escapism will end up being depressed too. 

Deal with whatever bugs you, and if you don’t know what you don’t like then listen to your gut it will tell you what’s wrong (probably your job, your annoying girlfriend/wife, having no purpose or hobbies, needings others to feel happy, etc.).



Quote 14: “Losing your life is not the worst thing that can happen. The worst thing is to lose your reason for living.” -Jo Nesbø

Answer: No. The worst thing is to die when you know that you could have found another reason to live (for example you lost your wife but found out that her dog came back home after he ran away) – and at that point, you die… 



Quote 15: “You’re fucked. You thought you were going to be someone, but now it’s obvious you’re nobody. You haven’t got as much talent as you thought you had, and there was no Plan B, and you got no skills and no education, and now you’re looking at forty or fifty years of nothing. Less than nothing, probably. That’s pretty heavy. That’s worse than having the brain thing because what you got now will take a lot longer to kill you. You’ve got the choice of a slow, painful death, or a quick, merciful one.” -Nick Hornby, A Long Way Down

Answer: This is how it must feel to face the truth after 50 years of not achieving anything worthwhile. Like being unplugged from the matrix after 50 years of being used to it.

Morpheus said that they don’t unplug people after a certain age because they refuse to accept the truth and that they will fight to protect the lie which they live. Would you quit your wife after 50 years of happy marriage if some guy showed you that she is a robot running a “love” program? 

It is important to take care of yourself first, if you don’t improve yourself you will end up with what you had when you were 20 (with a wife and children) when you are 50… except that they are now gone and you realize that you have nothing else left.

I had that realization after my ex-girlfriend left me when I was 22 (thank god I was young when this happened).



Quote 16: “Just an observation: it is impossible to be both grateful and depressed. Those with a grateful mindset tend to see the message in the mess. And even though life may knock them down, the grateful find reasons, if even small ones, to get up.” -Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

Answer: Agree with Steve, if you see the lesson/reason you will be able to learn from it and become a stronger man. I always try to see the lesson or reason why certain things in my life happen and it is the reason why I am who I am today.



Quote 17: “Life is like a game of chess. To win you have to make a move. Knowing which move to make comes with IN-SIGHT and knowledge, and by learning the lessons that are accumulated along the way. We become each and every piece within the game called life!” -Anonymous

Answer: Exactly, how do you know which decision is the right one to make if you lack the experience and insight? Ask other people and experts! But even they could be wrong and some are risk averse.

Consider their knowledge, their experience, and your own experience and knowledge and then make your decision. If you lack the experience and knowledge or have no access to others people knowledge then you should use Google.



Quote 18: “Depression isn’t a war you win. It’s a battle you fight every day. You never stop, never get to rest. It’s one bloody fray after another.” –Shaun David Hutchinson, We Are the Ants

Answer: Yes, but not longer than 30 days because my program is enough to change your thought patterns and to get your physical health back in tip-top shape.

People that suffer from depression longer than 30 days just ended up with therapists, medication and other useless crap because they didn’t know better (it happened to all of us).

Useless suffering and too much complaining (usually a byproduct of low testosterone “Low T”).


Quote 19: “Life is like a sandwich! Birth as one slice, and death as the other. What you put in-between the slices is up to you. Is your sandwich tasty or sour?” -Anonymous

Answer: Someone who gets it. If you want to live a good life then you better take responsibility for it and make sure that it’s good.

You don’t deserve better. There is no Karma system. You get what you work for. If you want lot’s of sex and money then waiting is not the right strategy.



Quote 20: “People try to say suicide is the most cowardly act a man could ever commit. I don’t think that’s true at all. What’s cowardly is treating a man so badly that he wants to commit suicide.” –Tommy

Answer: I was bullied once and it made me a timid and shy man, what helped me was beating my bullies up. My confidence grew to unknown heights that day – girls started to talk with me – and I stopped being so offended by words. 

I could have just laughed about their shit or ignore it – like therapists and women always tell you, but they would have never stopped with it. A week later we played basketball together. 

If you have to deal with stupid people then violence is always the answer. You can not talk with them.

And I know that most bullying victims are afraid, I was really afraid and I was wishing that it would end soon, but it wasn’t ending. I went to school feeling scared for 4 years…

That is no way to live, and in my opinion, if you commit suicide because you are scared then yes, you are a coward. Sign up at your local MMA gym and tell these guys that you are getting bullied.

They will make a war machine out of you, and soon you will have your revenge – much better than dying.



Quote 21: Sometimes even to live is an act of courage -Seneca

Answer: There is no “this is courage, this is not courage” definition. It depends on what you are afraid of.

If you act despite being afraid – that is courage. If you are afraid of your bullies and fight them I will try to make you my friend. There are no better friends than friends that back you up when the shit hits the fan. 



Quote 22: “Masculinity is not something given to you, something you’re born with, but something you gain. And you gain it by winning small battles with honor.” -Norman Mailer

Answer: The solution – I will reframe it into actionable advice: You are not a man by default, you become one. And to get rid of your depression you will have to fight to get rid of it. Check out my anti-depression coaching for more help.


Free Downloads to Get Rid of Your Depression

The journey to freedom – A self-improvement document and journal that encourages you to take action.
Masculinity is the key to cure male depression. Men don’t sit around people that claim to be experts of depression without experience and swallow pills that fuck their brains up. We take action.

Yes, there are problems that you didn’t think of yet, for example, your annoying girlfriend, your low paid job, needing others to feel good, a bad diet, not doing sports, etc.  

The truth has the power to transform a boy into a man – but only if you accept the truth and deal with it. Only knowing it is not enough to get rid of your depression – you will have to act.

If you don’t act and just know the truth it will become even worse because then you know the solutions but you don’t act upon them. So just do it.

PS: If you need me to guide you out of depression then book my coaching from the comfort of your home. You will stay anonymous, and I will tell you exactly how you can proactively beat your depression from day 1.

Also, what is your favorite quote about depression? Please write it into the comments!

About the Post Author 
Philip Braselmann was born 1990 in Germany and suffered from depression for 12 years after being diagnosed with essential tremor. He slowly learned to cope with it and went the normal route that every man walks. After his girlfriend cheated he was depressed again and decided that he is going to live a good life. It took Philip another year to realize that masculinity was the answer to getting rid of his depression. He loves Modafinil, working out and building his Business.

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